The rum is not helping

A very close friend and colleague at work is terribly ill. He went in to have a valve in his heart repaired, he is my age so that is disconcerting enough, but after the operation he had a stroke and he is currently in intensive care. I get random email updates on his condition but spend most of my time dwelling in the unknown.

Today Etel and I had to get out of the house, we were rained in all day yesterday, so we went off to collect shells. Etel is forever looking for the elusive Sunrise shell, I am content with adding new species to our collection of cone shells, augers, and cowries (the picture is of some of the new cones I collected today - Chaldean cone [10 O'Clock], Livid cone [2 O'clock], Cat cone [6 O'clock] and Rat cone [8 O'clock]).

No matter how hard I spent searching for shells, my mind returned to my colleague's health and I (irrationally) spoke to him as I combed the beach sand and waves for shells. I imagined kidney cells reviving, lung cells absorbing oxygen, and most important of all, brain cells reawakening from their hibernation unscathed during the terrible turn of events.

Remember when you were a kid when you would make bets based on the outcomes of uncontrollable events around you such as

"If the next wave crashing on the shore touches my foot, then I will get..."

Well I could not get myself to do that...I was too scared, afraid on how I would interpret the outcome. I only walked the shore and rubbed a beautiful shell fragment as I spoke to my friend through the aether.